Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

Sign In Register

Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!


Starting immediately, all new users must be approved by a moderator (due to spam issues). #sworry
You can dismiss this message by clicking the little 'X' in the top right this box.
If you are a pro triathlete, please click here to DM AaronWebstey for access to the 'Pros-only' private forum. Don't forget to include your real name, and a link to pro race result would be great if you're a 1st-year pro.



Last Active
Member, Administrator
  • The much anticipated, loved by everyone, super official, team TRS/BAUCCO SECRET SANTA!!

    Mine just arrived today: a freaking book of 30 BAAW submissions and critiques

    Love that each one was given a title

    Thanks to @Brent_R for putting this together. It's beautiful; I'm floored.

    kjrunninsimonsen77KenElPescadoPeladoItsShugwchevronM_WareAaronWebsteyCraig_DdoyoueventribroKuchGasBombDark_markDawnCneil5youngEvanRobert RankinJennifer PostTad_MHSeeley14iamuwereyournotuniquerangamelGrantInSLC
  • Oh Canada

    M_WareAaronWebsteykjrunninwchevronsimonsen77yournotuniqueStruangNotSoFatLewrangamelRobert RankinHSeeley14DawnCTad_MMamaCheetahKenElPescadoPeladoGasBombjimmymstevensonDHansenTriFastCat1107
  • Heavy/Death/Grind/Black/Weird Metal

    The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

    The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.

    The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.

    The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.

    The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.

    The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.

    The protagonist IS the dragon, dwells in the heart of the night with in a castle full of hellhounds and eternal flames. He kills the sassy knight, fucks the noble steed and sacrifices the princess to Satan.

    The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her. Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.

    The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.

    The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.

    The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.

    * NU METAL
    The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.

    The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about two minutes and then leaves…

    * Gothic Metal
    The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duet when he shows up, they sing while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly the dragon swallows up the pipe and accidentally scorches the beauty and the protagonist, and then he suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell for eternity.

    * Industrial Metal
    The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.

    * Speed Metal
    Suddenly there is a short solo, the dragon is confused; someone’s screaming weird stuff; the princess realizes she’s been deflowered; the dragon and the princess are still looking for the one who caused this.

    * Christian Metal
    The protagonist rides in on his way home from Church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank’ the protagonist he replies, “Sorry, but I don’t believe in having sex before marriage.”

    The protagonist enters the lair of the dragon with a full choir and orchestra, and the princess sings notes so high-pitched that she makes the dragon go deaf. The dragon tries to burn them all to death, but all of the members of the choir sing so loudly and unified, that it creates a protective bubble, which only grows in strength from the lead guitarist’s solo later in the song, and the flames bounce back and the dragon ends up killing itself while everyone escapes.
    dhrGasBombAaronWebsteyM_WarerigpigGregwarroKenElPescadoPeladoCraig_DDawnCADRBillyGranpa Chookdch93CJBerg007wchevronCapenItsShugdanimal_Tyournotunique
  • 2018 Goals and Challenges

    They want less sex to have more training time?
  • Penticton

    So, is everyone going to start sending unsolicited texts about CatFacts™ to @HSeeley14 ?

    M_WareCraig_DKenElPescadoPeladoBrew_TriDark_marksimonsen77scottyAaronWebsteyTad_Midking90Brendo78HSeeley14wchevronmaggieruRobert RankinGranpa Chook
  • Rankin = Legend.

    Not used to a woman finishing before you? ;)
    Robert Rankinidking90fyrehaarAaronWebsteyCraig_DKenElPescadoPeladoTad_MkjrunninEvanStruangrigpigGasBombMamaCheetahNotSoFatLewyournotunique
  • Talk me into (or out of) a ultra distance trail run.

    It's a timed hike.
    Try it.
    Don't get Lyme disease.
    Drink beer.
    HSeeley14AaronWebsteykjrunninEmilyCocksMartinIanLTad_Mccochranesimonsen77Robert RankinfyrehaarmaggieruKenElPescadoPeladoKuch
  • IMTX 2018

    2017 Male AG bike splits
    1 under 4:30
    9 under 4:40
    29 under 4:50
    78 under 5:00

    2018 Male AG bike splits
    63 under 4:30
    178 under 4:40
    277 under 4:50
    345 under 5:00
    balsdorfRobert RankinDerekLMartinJohns622KenElPescadoPeladoShepherddoyoueventribroAaronWebsteyfyrehaarCraig_Dsimonsen77Tad_M
  • 2018 Super League Triathlon

    Nothing warms the heart like the biggest Canadian bank sponsoring a rich-person's event on a Tax Shelter island in the UK.
    MartinJames LangeJennifer PostM_WarebbculpHMkrplunkitTad_MGranpa ChookSteve HalewskiMaddie_McKKenElPescadoPeladoslickfins_Ryan
  • 2019 Team - Rooster Endurance

    Will there be a bottom 69?
    MartinAaronWebsteyHSeeley14Maddie_McKCraig_DTad_MKenElPescadoPeladowchevronBrew_TriJames LangeOverBiker_Sam

The Roost

@ 2016 The Triathlon Roost, All rights reserved.

Contact us

Get In Touch