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The Interesting Life of a Triathlete’s Wife
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The Interesting Life of a Triathlete’s Wife
A triathlete wife’s take on living with a triathlete, written by guest author Kayle Spiller (wife of pro triathlete, Dusty Spiller).
Comments
There are 4-types of Ironman(that is someone who has completed at least 1-Ironman)
1. Someone who is single
2. Someone who wants to be single
3. Someone who will be single
4. Someone in a new relationship
http://markcathcart.com/about/
- Your house will turn into a giant pile shit no mater how hard you 'try' to keep it neat. Don't fight it, just let it happen.
- Have separate credit cards to maximize points at grocery stores and travel. Oh, and hide them from your wife.
- In fact, maintain separate bank accounts at all times, otherwise you'll see what kinds of stupid bullshit she thinks she needs to maximize her performance.
- Don't buy the cheap toilet paper... just don't, the investment is worth it.
- Sex? Ohhh yeah... we used to do that. Do yourself a favor and just forget it entirely, or convince her to have an open relationship. No matter what it doesn't end well.
- Make sure your neighbors know you're triathletes and that the noise coming from the basement is indeed bike riding and not freaky sex or you beating your wife.
- Don't book travel too far in advance and always make sure it's refundable.
- If at all possible do the same long course races. It's a lot easier to time your lives and trips together. It wicked sucks if one persons killing a large pizza after just finishing a race while the other is in a build week.
- Setup two TV's in front of the trainers. You'll never finish a 5 hour ride watching the stupid shit she puts on.
- When riding together lead so she doesn't have to, oh but you better not ride too fast or too slow. And for the love of god don't drop your wife on the long ride - the consequences are ugly, trust me.
- If she drops you on a long ride you better get your ass in gear - she doesn't like waiting at the car.
Living life in pursuit of triathlon greatness and not pissing off my wife. Also trying to understand Dark Mark and why he's left New York yet again, but this time for Oklahoma. At least it's not Florida.
Living life in pursuit of triathlon greatness and not pissing off my wife. Also trying to understand Dark Mark and why he's left New York yet again, but this time for Oklahoma. At least it's not Florida.
Me as Sherpa, Example 1: $50 cab out to 25km point of marathon in middle of Las Vegas desert to hand out Ibuprofen (note: this was 6 months into relationship and I had never watched a marathon before or been to Vegas. The only pills he would get from me in this situation now would be laced with ricin) only to have him run by smiling and saying, "no thanks, I feel great!". Then run (over 10km) all the way back to the race finish in flip flops and jeans to take pictures and lug his sweaty shit around post race as he schmoozed with his running friends.
Husband as "Sherpa", Example 1: Does not hold any of my shit, takes a few pics, but mostly selfies and let's our crazy dog loose on the race course to run up and jump on me 15km into a HIM run.
Me, example 2: lug a 4mo old puppy (if I had kids like some triathlon wives do there is no fucking way I would be out all over the course, those women are tough mofos!) around the IM Whistler course in 30 degrees C, take pictures, collaborate with friends, cheer him on, and then when he finally opens his eyes to pay attention to the giant cheering section created for him and our other friends and sees me talking to a friend as he runs by he throws his arms up in rage and says, "thanks for nothing!" hahahaha. We all laughed pretty hard. I still went and got his bike and all his shit while lugging the puppy around after the race.
Him, example 2: 10km into half marathon at a HIM, "why are you walking?". "Cause I have a fucking stitch and can't get rid of it". "Well hurry up, the dog and I are bored." Post race I lugged all my race gear and the dog back to our car while he Facebooked.
There was that one time he made a fake race bib and tried to run some of the IM marathon with me. I had to tell him to run behind me and not help me though as he kept trying and did not understand that I could get DQ'd for it. Or....maybe he did....I was on route to a faster IM time than he had ever logged....hmmmmm.